he just kept repeating that I have nice areolas
It's like you don't even want to get drunk with me everyday, anymore.
So I've only had a mustache for about 5 minutes and I'm already pretty sure it's the best decision I've ever made.
I just watched a video of Justin Bieber kissing a girl..... the sad thing is that I actually got upset.
I just want you to know how happy I am that you are circumcised.
I keep telling myself that if Britney can make it through 2007, I can make it through this date.
I fell off my bed and busted open my chin on the prisoner of azkaban. Somehow missed the almost empty Jose handle next to it. So guess what I was doing last night?
Look. When I let you cum on my tits don't fuck it all up by going "SKEET SKEET SKEET" it just pisses me off.
Snow days are when you really appreciate that your neighbor is on your bang roster.
I forgot to lock the bathroom door. He walked in, saw me on the toliet, nodded, and walked back out.
And as drunk as I was I was able to show my mom how to make text italicized in Microsoft word
Also I feel like death. But like. In a good way
HIGH AS FUCK. JUST WATCHED THE TRIPPIEST VIDEO EVER. IM NOT SCARED OF PANDAS. I GOTTA GO. TRIPPIN AGAIN
Just calm down. My foot long super joint and I will be over shortly.
I brought my porn computer to class by accident
How much porn do you watch if you need a special computer?
Randomize
