i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
"Is there dairy in semen?" was in her recent google searches...so she's lactose intolerant AND a slut.
just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
So after the reception we snuck back into the church for drunken hook up. we passed out there and woke up in time for 6am mass still dressed from the wedding. spiritually trashy or classy?
I am like king midas for the gay community. everything I touch turns into a lesbian.
I just realized this is gonna be the last time that I'm high in my childhood home. I'm kinda sad. I'm really high..
My head. My head is the problem. Also alcoholism.
OH MY GOD DO YOU REMEMBER WISHBONE? DO YOU REMEMBER THAT LITTLE BITCH? WHAT'S THE STORY WISHBONE
This is the guy I made out with and it made me think of my dad. Let's never talk about it again.
Tony's mom to him at breakfast: "I found the shirt you wore last night in the bushes this morning."
I just got winded making my bed. How do you think the workout plan is going?
My friend Julia's mom just called her to say she got a puzzle in the mail made of cheese and when she put it together it spelled FUCK YOU and she doesn't know who it's from.
got some info she was last seen with some guy wearing goggles
We are taking a shrt nap on the sidewalk cme fine me if you want but dont wake me up
I didn't think you were that drunk until you were trying to rub your foot on my vag under the table at the thai place.
Randomize