im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
my ass just sighed. even my farts are tired.
did the walk of shame from ex-boyfriend's room only to find other ex-boyfriend sitting in the living room. some people shouldn't be allowed to be friends.
some people shouldn't be allowed to be desperate.
Her cooch smelled like a combination of bacon and sweat.
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
everyday i am more and more thankful i can still check the no box for "have you ever been convicted of a felony?" on applications
You brought us all personal gifts you had stolen from the party and bellowed "hoes hoes hoes, clepto Santa loves you"
i want to be friends with one of those mini shredded wheat men.
My life is over. I farted in open court. Noticeably. The judge looked at me. It echoed.
Is it bad juju to glue mini budda to the bottom of a shot glass
So his roommate walked in on us, went upstairs to tell her bf she has found a new use for the rafters & they must try it.
How many ballsacks did you see last night because I saw eight
I still can't believe that dog licked my nipple.
I just ate part of my sock, this has got to stop.
Despite evidence suggesting otherwise, it turns out max is 100%straight.
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