can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
she gave me a disgusted look and asked how i could live with myself. because i havent seen the rocky horror picture show. and then dumped me.
Jessi just used the excuse "it's not you it's me" to get out of getting a lap dance.
after last halloween when i met that 26yr old guy from russia who was hot until we madeout and he became obsessed with touching my forehead after the ecstasy he did and then tried to sell me pills from an m&m mini container, i think im staying away from parties downtown
It's my first ever "i'm sorry for my excessive drug use" hand turkey. And I think it's pretty boss.
I totally just stopped for a booty call on the way to my parents for easter....good friday is an understatement
Honestly bro, I can't look at girls you've banged. Its like looking herpes in the face.
javelin tossed one of my crutches in to the mosh pit at the concert, hit some dude in the temple hahah fuck him he sucks
drunk freshman in the bathroom puking keeps saying "i'm a peasant" over and over
Both of our knuckles were split open this morning when I came out of the blackout, the column on the porch has two new cracks in it, were like the redneck Super Smash Bros.
Fuck off I wasn't that drunk. I was still able to toss froot loops in the air and catch them in my mouth.
And in your bra. It was quite entertaining.
Nice. The Governor's son bruised my vagina.
That's going to be the title of my memoir.
We were walking to the bar with a group of people and literally made 4 stops in people's lawns garages or random walls for him to eat me out
I think we should have a sex position advent calendar
This is your post bachelor party survival text. This a free and complementary service to make sure you are still alive. For alive, say yes. For hurting, say ugh. If lost, say help. If dead, please feel free to not respond. Thank you and we hope you enjoyed the party.
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