i either just vomited on a lesbian or a small boy
That's what you get for not wearing a bra and jumping on a trampoline
trent lit his nipple on fire and said "i am the only highlander"
i think i will get a tattoo on my butt that says "im not bluffin with my muffin", but i guess if i was serious, i would get it above my c-section scar
I need to surround myself with more reliable stoners...
my tits taste like a pina colada. how often do you get to say that?
I am dripping wet and slathered in glitter and banana mush. I love gay guys.
I hid drinks in her bathroom closet.... like a squirrel... a squirrel who knew she was going to get cut off soon
Did you shave a certain someone in his sleep last night?
I only listened to his story about leaving the Amish community because I was hoping for a free drink
What if everything solid was made of oreos and everything liquid was wine
I just got chills
I'm seeing double so when I get home can we have a threesome?
My little brother found me on Instagram. If I'm not already the shame of my family, I'm about to be.
If you're doing something that makes your best friend lock you in a bathroom you shouldn't be doing it
My vagina is very pro this idea
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