you always know who the new freshman are on fb because theyre always wearing prom dresses
i want two things in life...emily to stop talking and a block of cheese.
i thought i was pinching her nipple. It was her mole
For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
we should wear snuggies to the strip club
It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
Meh. People are people bro. All of us are hairless psychotic apes. Happy 420.
Coming to you live from the floor of my office..
He took a picture with a naked dude. I think he just walked out of that deep ginger closet.
Just watched a guy get through airport security with a full bottle of captain morgan. In my head the entire airport cheered.
Do you have any puffy paint? I want to put "fiesta muthafuckas" on my sombrero but its too much to bedazzle.
CUM CAME OUT OF MY NOSE. MY SINUSES ARE ENTIRELY FUCKED UP NOW BC OF THE CUM TRAVELING IN PLACES IT SHOULD NOT HAVE.
Everybody posting sickening holiday couple pics and I'm over here deepthroating a bottle of whiskey.
He goes from zero to fucking up in 2.4 drinks. Like the sportscar of bad decision making.
I've realized that drinking at your apartment alone on a Tuesday probably isn't a good thing.
Randomize
