He keeps looking? I tried to shag. I invited him to this table but he went to ze other one! If he shaves his 'tache I would totally hit it.
I just ate 3 burrito supremes and a crunchwrap...can't feel feet...I think I have diabetes
awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
She's never had brie before last night, don't know if I can date a girl that doesn't like soft cheeses.
She just used a chaser for red wine.
At least you weren't that one girl in the bar that was letting everyone draw on her in sharpie. Worst decision I've ever witnessed.
I hope your perfect outfit is a slutty power rangers outfit. That's been my dream wedding since I was a kid.
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
So if I get kidnapped from my office and go missing for a few days does that count against my vacation days and do I still get paid?
I am going to be so excited tomorrow when I find this box of crayons in my purse
Powdered alcohol is a real thing now. Move over crystal light... Water bottles rejoice!!
I've had to take two showers today and it's not even 1 o'clock. Why won't this weekend wash off?
I'll just go on tinder. Seeking strong male to help take apart ikea furniture and move. I'll touch your dick.
If you wake up with half a an eyebrow.... I'm pretty sure it was a good time.
I am drunk and aggressive about the olympixs
It's spelled Olympics
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