I am not drunk. I will recite the pledge.
I don't want you to recite the pledge!
Pledge alligien to america to united states of america
she sang that "this little piggy song" to my balls. and somehow made it work, with me only having two balls instead of five.
The professor just announced to the class that I talked to him in the bar on my birthday.
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
You can't just hum the Jaws theme song when you pull down my pants.
Vegas should really enforce the buddy system because if not everyone is going to end up swimming during the water show in front of the Bellagio.
Just explain how I got from the bar to a house I've never been in, waking up to a cop in uniform ripping a bong
shit went down at the bar when this girl with 'morals' totally cock blocked a married guy. she actually kicked IN the bathroom door when they were fucking in there. then we all did shots.
I have a huge bruise on my thigh that I am 95% sure is due to you repeatedly throwing me over couches.
I think it's starting to become crucial that I find a companion for my vagina.
Is there a particular reason why everyone is now calling you Butt Doctor?
You peed on a pole and declared to a cop that it was your pole and yelled at him to not even look at it, and then yelled at all of us for looking at it.
Get his dick out of your ass and put on some pants we're here
She was chasing her shots with beefaroni and I think I fell in love.
Im crossing my legs while on the toilet. It's like I'm unconsciously thinking "if im going to barf and shit at the same time, Im at least going to do it LIKE A LADY"
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