my head looks like a cockatoo
mine looks like a lions mane...looks like the entire zoo is going to prom
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
bitch please you did NOT just unlike my status..
We convinced him to snort an altoid. We should not be allowed to drink together
you looked at me, pointed to a car and silently said "the elephant parks here".
Everything smells like beer. Everything. But I cant drag myself out of bed to take a shower. So beer it is.
Me. blonde. Sex. Dance floor.
I think that's the key to being an adult though... Get those rapid fire beer shits out I the way early, then you can go about your grown man business
No, they seem attractive after SIX beers, after three they're just the gender you're looking for.
Sarah's knitting me a hat as an apology for unknowingly making out with my boyfriend
I love it when he cheats on me with nice people
Discovery: bouncers seem to get really upset about fire
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
sexting while watching Peter Pan the Musical! something just doesn't seem right here
I had sex with him in the back of my car in a duck onesie. I'm worth something dammit.
Anytime he goes down on me i automatically think of you cheering me on. Your a good friend.
Randomize