tod's in jail
he was afraid of holiday checkpoints so we let him ride my mom's tandem bike home. by himself. at 4 am.
i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
I shaved my legs finally. I am starting to remember what my skin feels like.
Just woke up. My philosophy paper is a play, and my paper for musical theater is about physics. That's some dank shit you sold me
I'm just trying to jam my tits into some coconuts and I'll be on my way
Apparently, there is a horrible ghonorrea out break at our school. Woo! What a way for Loyola to welcome us back.
Was this before, or after you took my brand new bag of shredded cheese, and "Made it rain"?
I just realized that two weekends in a row we ended up in a bathroom with two different boys asking us for a threesome. does this happen to everyone?
the whole "pretend to be sober/pull it together for my family" thing really blew up in my face when i threw up into my pillowcase.
Notice: I will be intoxicated and in your area this evening. To unsubscribe from my sexual solicitation list, reply 'fuck off'.
The bartender just hugged us goodnight. I think we go there too often.
Oh yeah and one of the strippers brought you chips and water when you were passes out next to the toilet. So that was nice
And you were like wow I love water shots they taste so good
Playing pong against a girl who fucked my ex boyfriend so that's how my nights going
I think the cop who arrested me yesterday is at my gym rn should I say hi
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