My nipple is on Facebook.
She wouldn't stop telling me the story of the penis and how she got laid.
why wash my dick in the morning if you're not there to suck it?
Last nIght I drank wIth the new guy from fellowshIp & my pastor I've known sInce I was 7. It was agreed by them that I had nIce tIts. I'm not weIrded out In fact I'm flattered...
i think i want to fuck a midget just to see how difficult it would be
She looks like Sash Grey but sounds like Fran Drescher. Advise.
As soon as he told me I had a 'pretty laugh' I knew I'd be putting out more than I had originally planned.
Apparently I gave him a 'Steve jobs blowjob'
I dont think he was a real cab driver. I think he was just a creepy guy with a van.
We need to get her a baby shower present. And no, a blow up sex doll with her dead boyfriends picture stuck to it, is not appropriate.
I can't remember where my feet are. All I can see are colors, and all I can feel is terror. The lollipop was a bad idea.
After he finished he sang his college fight song like it was some victory
I know but at least you've never been asked to have sex dressed up like Catwoman
just saw a kid get pissed on buy a tiger at the zoo. His dad is rofling and the kid is crying. I think I have to go make a new friend
It wasn't until I lost my earring that I realized "I've been here before". Turns out we fucked a year ago. We've decided to make it a tradition.
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