Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
well thats why i like him. because he makes you happy. on the other hand i think he masturbates too much while texting you.
fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
so i decided not to tell her that her fiance is cheating since i already bought the bridesmaid dess
I can count the number of hours she's been sober this weekend on one hand.
As the night goes on these shots are getting so much easier. My liver jst needed a warmup lap.
If a hot cougar texts u and says "back massage, blow job".... you show the fuck up.
Someone with the Instagram name "hymenbreaker" just liked a photo of me and my grandma. I feel ashamed.
The guy had great intentions when throwing us free beer off the balcony... but of course I was the one to get hit in the face because that's the kind of luck I have
First sunburned tits of the season. And it's only April... I feel like it's going to be a good summer.
Lets get drunk and then you just wraps me into a present because that sounds like fun after the past 3 glasses of wine I drank
While I'm here in reality dreaming of catching chili cheese fries with my mouth out of t shirt guns like Jesus is real
How naked do you want me to be?
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
Periods are much less exciting when you're not sexually active.
Randomize
