Can you return condoms to CVS?
Only if you return your pride as well.
I bought the love spell lotion from victoria secret so it atleast smells like a girl is present while I'm masturbating
Just saw the hottest 4 garbage men ever. They should make a calendar
my mom told me that she didn't count me in the census because im a waste of life anyway.
I'm gonna go out in a limb and say living out middle school fantasies is never a good idea
As she was leaving she said "You have an awesome penis, I hope to use it again soon" I need that on a business card to hand out at the bar
Woke up Christmas Eve morning with my face smelling like ballsack.. No regrets.
The next time you try to drunkenly strip me in public let's make sure it's not anywhere near the daiquiri factory or a group of police officers.
I desperately wanted to wear your shirt.
We'll just play it by vagina and see where it leads us
Oh yeah and one of the strippers brought you chips and water when you were passes out next to the toilet. So that was nice
Also you can't just sext a Michelle quote from Full House.
Is there such thing as a tasteful dick pic? I think I just got one if they exist.
he said he couldn't believe he just lost his virginity and passed out. what have i done
Topless, eating sour gummies, doing a crossword, at 4 AM. TELL ME IM BEAUTIFUL!
eveytime i go to his house my cute clothes always get taken off what's the point of even wearing them there?
Randomize
