Well apparently he's into motor boating.
found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
Have you ever seen a 300 pound pregnant lady's boob fall out of her shirt cuz she's not wearing a bra? I have.
i literally forgot his name and just started calling him "waffles"
just next time i won't let coke make me think I'm superman and drink a shit ton.
I offered to go to AA with him...not because I am admitting I have a problem but because I want to see what they are saying about people like us.
And the best part is that she's coming home to find that I completely shaved her dog.
Were playing beruit winners pelt losers with eggs
You know how hard it is to jerk off in a bathtub with a dog staring at you?
Serious question...Is it possible to get a DUI on a kayak?
there's an entire drinking game devoted to nobody liking her face
It must be love. I'm deleting my porn for him.
She fucked the dishwasher AND the manager.
Well, she isn't a classist. You've got to give her that.
I'M OFFICIATING THIS WEDDING. HOLY SHIT.
Maybe? I'm not shaving my pubes for a maybe type of night.
Randomize
