I really want to fuck my wifes sister.
What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
He has jerked off in so many socks I am surprised he doesn't have athletes dick
Just so we both are on the same page, I have no solid plans as to where I'll be sleeping tonight.
A 12 year old Canadian kid said I was a pussy for only buying a 28-pack. I fit in better in this country.
im trying to find a facebook picture of him that doesnt make me regret sleeping with him. its not working
Is it bad that i wanna bang this girl ONLY because she looks like my cousin?
I may or may not have just hot boxed a backhoe on the construction site of a police station that's being rebuilt..
in other news, i feel like i just shat out all my sins.
Is it bad i hate my job so much I'm actively trying to get fired tonight by drinking all the booze we have so I don't have to show up for my double tomorrow. Four mango vodkas later I have decided I'm a better server drunk.
Of the 4 nights I've gone downtown this week, I've been "piss in the parking lot" drunk 5 times
Lesson learned. Don't roleplay with a real knife.
Turns out both me and my grandpa have a guilty pleasure for South American men.
"Being an adult" and "being happy" are two circles that do not overlap in my Venn diagram of life.
Randomize
