dude, you're being a jerk.
sorry, didn't mean to pull a Cheney
I brought my laptop into the bathroom so I can facebook while vomiting. New low?
How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
I know we didn't hook up because i was still wearing my fanny pack in the morning
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
Anytime you have a hot, flirty, married woman that wants to ride you like a horse and slap your ass, you've got to do it.
Yeah, but four times?
yes you're required to wear a bikini its the snowpocalypse beach party
he asked if i wanted their team name to be " Amandas angels" or " Fuk budies" either way an intermural softball team of all my hook ups from spring semester is just depressing. convenient but depressing
dude. this chick is staring at me like i gave her brother herpes.
Dude she's on meds. He has a ginormous penis. Ur A dumbass. That concludes our feelings chat. Dim Sumday?
She still cant shoot whiskey?
Im having serious doubts about this relationship
I thought turtle was a code word for weed until he pulled out a baby turtle from his pocket and said "$20 for a turtle"
Good god, my descendants are going to be fucked.
You followed me up the stairs while i was throwing up yelling "projectile! projectile! projectile!"
He said when the pizza came I zip locked one slice and went to the couch and snuggled with it. Does that give you an idea of how my night was?
Randomize
