Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
Two girls I have never met just thumb wrestled to decide who gets to make out with me.
Made a visit to my old puking stall. I missed it.
It's like, I'm the official vagina for that DJ group
A hangover is a type of food poisoning. Makes me feel better about calling out of work.
We lit firecrackers from NYE in the fireplace and he was so passed out that he slept through it.
we've called him dos banos ever since he threw up in 2 separate bathrooms with the same puke
It's a self-perpetuating puke chain.
He showed me one of his balls and said "this one's free. you'll have to work to see the other.."
I mean honestly, what would you have done?
Not screw her in the church house?
WHAT KIND OF DEALER ONLY WORKS FRI-SUN???
Ours, apparently.
We could probably bang our way to enlightenment. However acid helps.
I don't know. Seeing the vagina stretched out beyond normal proportions is like watching your favorite superhero die.
I stopped telling people I'm a pansexual unless they ask first, really tired of explaining what that means.
You just kept telling everyone to call you MFT.. Mother Fucking Tornado.
Randomize
