break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
I remember having a drink with vegetables in it. They said it was a mojito, but it tasted like cabbage.
haha i love mojitos
ya and i hate cabbage
remember when jerking off was fun and not a neccesity
the date was going great.. until he pulled down his pants and asked if there was any hair in between his cheeks.
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
The story about him having a girlfriend changed real fast when he found out that I was a gymnast
I'm wearing cowboy boots and showing way too much cleavage to be in a place with no jaeger.
What would you do if you came home and i was in nothing but the table cloth?
Tonight will bring shame to my future grandchildren.
This is America. Thomas Jefferson would have said I want some vagina.
He left in the middle of the night, he left his shoes behind and stole my doc martens..size 6 female. Wtf?
He put a canoe in the lazy river at the water and started paddling away from security
You were ¾ of the way through the first pitcher of margaritas then you turned to me and said "Wow I can barely taste the vodka!" And then…….
...Then...
Then I told you margaritas are made with tequila not vodka. You whipped the pitcher at the wall and ordered another one
I reek of vagina.. My cab driver commented.
How did you get so drunk?
Alcohol.
Randomize