shes hot in the i'd deny it if anyone asked kinda way
i ate 2 chicken nuggets and puked out 5. that doesn't even make mathematical sense
i woke up to 115 texts from him all saying "do you love me??"
At chipotle, there's a bachelorette party starting out the night here, i'm going to let you imagine what the bride to be looks like
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
I just filled out my 2010 Census drunkenly. I'm single handedly throwing it off.
He found my weave.. Think he'll still fuck me Friday? And how do I ask for it back?
Dont forget about the tuna sandwich behind your TV
he fell down during beer pong and the chick told him to rub the sand out of his pussy and suck it up. i am in love
Doap. Just bring some lube and a slingshot. Not sure y we need the slingshot.
If you hear a sad honk in the wind it is me.
i just got banned from the m&m's website for trying to get poon slayer written on my custom order
There are grandparents doing keg stands I don't know
I might volunteer to give breath samples on the 17th where I would be required to get drunk and then give samples! THE POLICE WOULD PAY ME AND PROVIDE THE ALCOHOL!
My cousin was arrested on a class b felony for selling meth out of the back door of McDonald's where he worked. Apparently it was the extra special sauce.
It was a career choice to be sure... Mistakes were made.
Randomize
