i'm not going because i feel like it's just gunna be a "this is your life" who i banged this years addition
Two questions: what are you doing RIGHT NOW? and do you know how to drive a golf cart?
All I need is the Internet and a place to drink.
i just like, need to vent to someone
Can we skip the part where I pretend to care and fast forward to the appreciative blowjob from you?
i havent blinked in 235 seconds. now 247. now 258. 263. 267. 271. i also have been gifted with theability to both type and count and not blink. 293 so magical
I just want to curl up with him and brush his hair and sing love songs together, I think you should come over and end this
I'm not liking this ratio of moving to blowjobs...
She said " I'm going to get her back one day soon for putting extacy in my pop while I drove her to whislter" just a heads up.
Hes drunk and dancing naked. I can hear his dick smacking his legs from the next room.
The shit I just took made me regret every life decision leading up to it.
i did nothiing wrong other than not tell that kid his whole back was covered in puke
Literally the only reason we didnt get arrested was because the cop said I reminded him of Steve Stifler from American Pie
I just Miyagied my roommate through her first set of tit pics. Her fuck buddy owes me.
what's your room number? I've never been there sober...
If they start to date again I refuse to help her sext him. Helping my mom sext my dad is where I draw the line.
Randomize
