I wish I only lived at night.
I just went to a subway where the girl didn't know how to make a blt. I will not miss public school texans.
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
She just got in car wreck. Wreck sex is better than break up sex
So, do you know where my left shoe is? I mean, we were at a few places last night, and I called them. No luck for me.
We had phone sex and he came in his sink. i will never eat off one of his plates again
I don't even see the point of going over to his place dressed anymore.
I hope you fall on your chin.
Jealousy makes you ugly.
I'm more worried that you thought licking a pole on Bourbon street would turn me on
If I shaved my pubic hair into a heart for valentine's day how much would you judge me?
You also proposed and then tried to jack me off
I'm worried about your health. And your boobs. Actually, health, then boobs. Health first, boobs second. And third.
I don't know what she looks like but I'm pretty sure she has a pussy.
Yeah you'd pretty much be ruined if you broke up with a guy like that and then had to return to the dating pool
I remember telling you that I think Taylor Swift has stolen my essence. I still think that's true.
"I mean like shit happens" should never be an excuse for anything
Randomize
