Yeah. He most definitely jizzed himself in the face.
So you know how craigslist used to have an "erotica" section? And how after you click on a link it changes a darker color? And how Dad stays up really late most nights?
Oh god... well at least he's gettin some. Mom's a prude.
oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
i don't understand how she was down there for so long, she's like a mermaid, a blowjob giving mermaid.
IS FOOTBALL GONNA SUCK HIS DICK? NO, IT IS NOT
There are regrets in my world today- mostly jager at that fucking altitude
I gasped. Both pairs of lips did.
There is a glee sing along. It's on random and they know them all. Like, the specific glee timings and pauses. I need to leave. I need to escape
I'm confused as to why I have a picture of your boobs in response to a photo of my father
Literally if she wants to make a big deal, I'd rather have shit smeared on my face.
my whole checking account just had a funeral down bourban street, paid for that, and then bought everyone 5 shots of fireball...
I don't care how hot she was. She didn't like Scooby Doo and I don't fuck with that.
It just makes sense. It's like I end a relationship, and wash myself of sin... with tequila.
I'm on someone's yacht. I don't know who. But I'm on it. There's a guy passed out in a kilt holding bagpipes. Help.
Hi I love you will you be up for a while!
That exclamation point was a drunk decision
Randomize
