At one point last night while tipping the bartender you looked at him and said "If I need money later, I'm taking this back"
this is the fifth day in a row i've woken up after 3 pm, hungover. I might die when snowmageddon is finally over and we have to go back to class. my liver wont know how to take it.
Well, I just watched him puke into his pitcher at the bar, I doubt he cares about anything other than the fact that he needs a new beer.
When were having sex he was mumbling some guys name. If he wasn't as hot as he is I'd be concerned.
I thought making out with his sister would be a great way of meeting him. But it backfired.
I'm not sure...it could be the pasta I ate from her sink, the dominoes, or just the alcohol. Or a wicked combination of all 3.
I think god is proud of me so he is rewarding me in discounted wine
Take off that red sweater and wear my vagina as a facemask.
I'm just going to eat until there's an actual reason why he wouldn't want to fuck me.
Now that I've quit blow, I think I'm allergic to my cat....
I would say don't do anything I wouldn't do, but we both know I forget about my personal safely when getting laid is on the line
He literally had a Trump sign in his front yard. I just can't now.
I wish I was there so i could bitch slap his incredibly sexy face
You planned on giving him head in the shower?
More like I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
I love when Facebook suggests people I may know. Well, yeah, I know him. He's my drug dealer. Pretty sure I want to keep that relationship strictly professional.
Randomize