SECOND walk of shame from the westside Hilton, SECOND foreign family w kids staring at me in my dress, glitter purse, spiky heels and booze breath. I said I was going to church. More confusion.
last night i used 411 to try and contact britney spears.
dollar well spent
he made me stop in the middle of the blowjob to turn the tv towrds him. i then proceeded when he stopped me again to get him the remote. fuck me.
im pretty sure i just dented her unborn child.
if you really think there are plastic pots safe for the stove i fear for your future landlords.
I just found cold cuts in the blender. You and beefeater can no longer have unsupervised parties.
That's so unfortunate for him bc you can always find another penis, but he's stuck with it
Well then. It seems like we have a Mexican standoff of genitals
the number of desperate girls at the gym right now is unfair. it would be cruel not to let one blow me.
he went at my nipples like a starved dog.
How do I discreetly dispose of sex toy packaging that is recyclable? What to do...what to do?
I'm not so good at organized events that don't revolve around whiskey or playgrounds.
Just ate a gummy bear I found in my sheets. So yeah, 2013 is SO gonna be my year.
I had a dream about a vibrator with 42 different settings. If that's not a good indication I need to get laid, I don't know what is
My mother expressed her concerns about my drinking via a facebook message.
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