Yeah, we realized keeping you in a cage wasn't beneficial to us
yeah for some reason your penis didn't fit in my mouth the other day
So i just got diagnosed with swine flu. im at walgreens looking like shit and this guy keeps staring at me. Im so gonna cough in his face.
well, dont
I didnt. i just coughed then looked at him menacingly. he got it.
I apologize for excluding you. On a better note: the stripper that made out with my wife friend requested me on facebook
Waking up with a sore back because you put the team on it for jager pong all night
WHY AM I THE ONLY ONE CONCERNED ABOUT THE SEAGULL IN THE OVEN
Well just watched a guy puke in a trash can then proceed to pick pizza outta said trash can and eat it
The guy at the door just stared only at my boobs and said "I'm gonna let you in." 'Merica
He's like a fucking cake pop, the greatest thing in the world while it lasts, but it never lasts for long enough
You threw up in a empty pizza box at Pizza Hut and opened the door with your face. So that maybe why it's bruised.
If I ever go to jail it will be because of you, I can feel it.
Slap a cop in the butt for a felony charge. Check.
you were so high you asked for half double stack and half crispy chicken sandwich "welded together" in the wendy's drive through
Teacher vividly described one of the times he did shrooms, sat down, sighed, and told everyone to go do drugs and let us out 15 minutes into class. I love community colleges
dude im trying to eat his ass so can you stop for 10 minutes
Randomize
