i wish i could watch tv and lissten to music at the same time...but still understand both
i think otters can do that
Passing out during sex is actually quite pleasant. its like being rocked to sleep with a penis
I just realized that he was my first random hookup that didnt cause a massive breakup or divorce. Im starting to grow up
my knee is completely bruised from kneesliding into the bowling ball. bowling for creativity points was a win
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
This is simple. Just sex and high fives. No feelings.
Well his ex just grabbed his dick and told him yep Ill call u later
You better keep a close eye on your uterus tonight cause I am looking good.
all my money is vodka money
I have never read a truer sentence.
You tried to bite my nipple like 3 times
NAh son
Just general bites
I fell asleep in the tanning bed, naked, for an hour and a half and I guess they couldn't wake me up so they called the fire department...and they came in while I was passed out naked...
I rather not break my neck. It's hard to look sexy with a neck cast.
So the next time I call you and say I'm going to my first strip club because it's christmas eve eve, and have work the next morning, I'd appreciate you stopping me
New guy moved in the apartment next door. He's a combat vet, 6'4", Adonis body and going to med school. My vagina is chewing thru the wall as we speak.
hotelroom bed is big enough to masturbate in, but small enough to not want to sleep in it after you've masturbated in it
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