see you put your penis in her and it's like an ignition key to start the crazy
And you kept hanging up and calling back because you thought I wasn't greeting you properly.
did i have both of my shoes on when the bouncer threw us out last night?
We lost the cork forthe wine, so we used a tampon as a replacement. I never loves tampons so much
I just threw up in my hands while sitting on the toilet
No, he's fine. He only wanted to know why there were traffic pylons in the living room and how the peanut butter got on the ceiling.
I'm crawling around naked in my room looking for my hairbrush. Just thought I'd put that image in your head.
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
I had a moment while I was smoking where I was looking at these palm trees and I knew how dr Seuss came up with his characters.
I know. I told you I'm a mess. She had weird nipples. I almost lost an eye to one.
Oh I love our desires, it's riding my bike at 2 AM with a massive erection that I dislike.
He barged in the room with no shirt on, all fucking ripped with a half keg under one arm. Sara now calls him Bronan the Beerbarian
Let us rub each other in fish scales and become mermaids
Jeff brought me a cup of coffee to my desk. He's getting a blow job.
I realize ur driving andwont read this til u stop, but I'm sleeping in the bed of the pickup. Please don't hit a deer.
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