Just looked in the bathroom mirror before getting to this exam to see If I look as bad as I feel & the answer is no. I look amazing, even in yesterday's clothes
Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
Most awkward thing ever just happened. I was reaching in my purse to get something and a condom fell out into the woman's lap next to me. At least she knows I'm safe.
turns out Discover card thinks that if you spend $450 at four different liquor stores in one evening that the card "must have been stolen"
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
he showed up at my house with a hand-stiched sweater that said "girlfriend?"
she's got a whisker from her dead cat taped to the wall. I'm pretty sure that about sums it up...
but he gave me mouthwash after the bj. no ones ever done that for me before.
Also, I think I'm too drunk to be at the gym right now. But how sober do you need to be for IM volleyball?
I feel as if the hash cupcakes on top of mushroom chocolates was a little excessive last night
I feel like our relationship should have moved on from you constantly asking if I'm gay
Whatever, you're gonna have to break it to mom that the reason I was so drunk at Christmas dinner is because she wouldn't stop asking me why I don't have a boyfriend
he just used a semicolon in the middle of a sext
If I could figure out how to do him with his wranglers on you would never see me again.
I woke up to a bum peeing outside my window, and he said, "This is embarrassing for you."
Randomize
