I am slurping my drink like I am going to the electric chair
i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
I either just heard my neighbors having sex or she really agreed with whatever he was talking about.
I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
Whenever I miss you I just turn on Tool Academy
just found a sign outside my brothers door "not going to church, don't even try" and he is covered is vomit in his bed.
We were laughing at the passed out guy who had gone to sleep under the car in the McDonald's lot until we realized it was you.
she carries around a jar of peanut butter. "just in case".
Could be my worst decision since the whole 'third degree burn' fiasco.
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
Apparently he's taking the slut he cheated on me with on a cruise for her birthday. THAT COULD HAVE BEEN ME. TITANTIC STYLE.
My ex was there, the 2 girls I'm seeing showed up and I had a pocket full of VIP passes 2 the strip club. Had all the makings of an epic night but I fell asleep at the bar.
Only three months past my 21st and I'm done. So many life lessons in so little time.
I buy a new bowl every time I get a new guy. It's retail therapy.
You set a couch on fire in my brothers backyard?
Just the cushions
Randomize
