I couldn't deal, she's a vegetarian. Every woman should like a little meat in their mouths.
did you fuck him yet?
hahaha who do you think your talking to.. a nun?
If I send you a picture of the guy passed out in the bath tub, will u be able to identify him?
are we at that level where i can tell you your girlfriends tits looked really good yet?
I blacked out after the shots of canned lobster bisque.
Same here... Well I was planning on having some sort of deep conversation, but looking at how grim of an outlook tomorrow has on you, I'll just re-inform you that I have your pants.
You are the worst substitute drug dealer ever
Before you even think your day was worse than mine, I had to disinfect and and stitch another dude's penis after his prince Albert got ripped out by an angry chick.
Just so were clear I meant the head your face is on
I'm in a bed full of sand, and also just took my contacts out. Whatever happened yesterday was great, I think.
Passing out is my livers way of protecting my mind.
Just tried to dig out holes in my mattress for my boobs so I could be comfortable lying down on my stomach
He stumbled out of the bathroom with his pants around his ankles yelling "tie my shooes!"
I'm to the point where I just want to get back at him in a hot man sex tornado way.
Don't do it. He's got a dick the size of a baseball bat. You don't want that commitment.
I have to. For the sake of science.
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