Didn't tell him I was on my period. Then had to surreptitiously remove some uterine lining from his cock.
I just saw that cheerleader from u of arkansas that I hooked up with over spring break on espn. My parents would be so proud.
I just sang country roads at the top of my lungs with my cab driver. Tonight was a success.
Im about to smoke a huge bowl. My penis is so happy. Who needs girls.
look in the field by the highway and see if there is a high heel there. Or some Taco Bell bags.
eating on the run again ?
My head feels like Jesus is projectile vomiting hammers on it
I broke my heels and ended up on a random party bus where I passed out after a brief stripper pole incident.
I smell like a skunk, but I'm okay with that.
We decided to try to steal hot dogs but it ended up with me punching him in the face and crying. Pretty solid night
Again. I'm very sorry I tried to poke your eye out. You've been aware of my inability to aim since day one.
I'll screw just about anything, but I draw the line there
He told me I remind him of his ex girlfriend but in a better more advanced way..
I kinda forgave him after he laid next to me and rubbed my arm for four hours while I tripped balls.
I don't think you could pull off being mean.
How do you think I'm still single?
No I feel the same as usual. Mopey with a chance of bitch fits.
Randomize
