your head's too prwtty to be stuck in the books
I found the seven page love letter I had written you. I'm sorry i was so obsessed.
this girl literally referred to her butthole as her "back pussy"
My cousin just told me i smelled good. She must like the smell of cum.
whore
i got a blow job in the bathroom during intermission at the hockey game. i'm pretty sure i made Canada proud.
do you think you could subtly ask him about the dimensions of his penis?
My uncrustable is thawing in my straightener
At one point, you closed your eyes and asked me which 'six flags' we were at
how did we start talking about space blow jobs?
Hardcore start to spring break. Mike is wearing adult diapers because the only stop we are making is for gas.
I will not be held responsible for my vagina's poor judgment.
We ended up on their roof with our pants around our ankles shotgunning beers at one point.
Get off the floor, put away the cookie dough, get ur shit together Scott.
His ex told me that she wanted me to "take care of" him but from the way she said it I couldn't tell if she wants me to look after him or murder him.
He's a fucking ninja- think of the things he can probably do with his dick.
Randomize