She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
yes, too bad my tears were being wiped away by tits in my face
you should probably quit with the whole "no homo" thing, especially when you are drunk, "mo homo"gives the wrong impression.
i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
Contrary to what peaches says, you can't fuck the pain away. Full story later. Have a good morning, buddy.
He kept insisting that I was going to have an orgasm but it just felt like he was rubbing sand paper on my vagina
and now there are teeth marks on my dick.
You need to let me be on top sometimes. I gotta get rid of these love handles
I'm currently making some changes in my life. If you don't hear from me anymore, then you're probably one of them. Or I'm dead.
What vodka is american?
Skyy. I already looked it up for 4th of july.
I vaguely remember taking a yard light, holding it up like the statue of liberty, and all of us at the party chanting the national anthem. What a glorious night
New York City is dangerous when the only bars you go to are the ones that have 'open' in front
He was dressed as the 420 Easter bunny...he looked like a walking anti-drug campaign.
You can't give me tequila around boys who have girlfriends. That ain't new.
where the fuck are you? she just tazed two people and we're tripping shrooms...successful first night in new apartment!
Randomize
