Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
Driving out to Plano is like driving away from your twenties
she starting giving me head in the taxi..the driver told her to stop..she looked up, said "I'm the birthday girl", and kept on doing what she was doing.
yes, we have a friends with benefits thing. i found out he had never 69'd, done anal or had a threesome. i told him i was going to rock his world.
and what did he say?
there were no words. he looked like a kid on christmas morning.
There's nothing like sitting directly behind someone you fucked 5 years ago at church on Easter Sunday
it took me 20 minutes to get her upstairs... she crawled under a car and wouldn't come out.
THC water in my coffee on the way to work. How's your Tuesday?
he came in the room wearing gloves & rapping while eating a corndog
knight in shining armor
I just remember her dragging me inside in a panic saying we needed mentos and popcorn I have no fucking clue how we ended up asleep in her closet.
Honestly you'd think more guys would be happy to date a cute female dealer, but apparently something about safety or whatever
I'm crying and shaving my Bronco playoff beard
My hand smells like rave and peanut butter.
can we not compare my dick to a children’s folk tale
After a beer I realize now I may have shared too much about my obsession with ghosts with my therapist this morning.
I just convinced a telemarketer I live in a tree.
What did he say?
He still asked if I want a home security system.
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