If he can handle my muffin top then I can handle his front teeth.
Great, now everyone thinks I've had giraffe semen in me
Those former-lesbian gone white-trash bars always seem to be your favorite.
we've progressed from teabagging to lighting eachothers asses on fire. this cannot be a good path.
If I die and they 'assume' it's natural causes, just go with it.
you are the best fuck buddy i could have, all the others get feelings and morals involved
Pretty sure I just became the first person ever to use the word "boner" in a wedding card...
It's nice to see a girl prepared for the walk of shame. She brought headphones
I am currently exfoliating my skin with the toilet. We've never been so close.
He started doing the gator chop at my vag and said he couldn't wait to "chomp" on it later...and I still slept with him. I hate gainesville.
He passed out with the ball in his hand so no one could play beer pong without him.
He told me I was 100% better then porn then passed out nto the cake
Moments after comforting her about her boyfriend issues I found myself in the other room showing him my tits.
I mean honestly, what would you have done?
Not screw her in the church house?
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
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