i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
i have a strong feeling i fucked one of the waiters here...
would he be offended if i told him that "national coming out day" is october 11. thats subtle enough right?
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
well, obviously he didn't fuck me for my strong moral fiber.
Went to an open-bar law school party and puked in front of Justice Scalia. My legal career is now complete -- I literally got judged by a U.S. Supreme Court Justice. Can't get any higher than that.
Having a vagina does not stop me from believeing my balls are bigger than yours.
Calling a preemptive no homo on tonight's activities
trying to figure out what happened last night by looking around the apartment.
naked man under the piano. THE PLOT THICKENS.
All I want to do is get high and needlepoint. Fuck your judgement
whose parrot is this?
So I can confidently say that I'm the only 3rd year engineering student who completed all 4 of their exams with One Direction pens
I didn't want to see any of his nipples and now I've seen all three. Thanks.
The guy I screamed at across the bar for booing the Bruins ended up buying me shots I had to explain to him there's not a chance in hell I would ever fuck a Canadian! #Bostonstrong
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