Where did you get a picture of my penis
You don't need id to drink rum in an alley.
Going to Kmart high is like jumping in a time machine back to the 80s
im trying to catch a child molester. call you later.
For the record I fully support drunken you in most social situations... Just not charity events.
this year's halloween challenge: make audrey hepburn go from classy to slutty drunk
I've been thinking about it and if we ever have a threesome it'll start off with us clothed solely in our matching fur vests
dude. i just ate tomato soup with a funnel. we're out of spoon-straws.
You do realize there's a subtle difference between not remembering your outfit from april 17th of last year vs forgetting that last night you undressed in the street and were grabbing every dick you could reach, right?
I called him daddy. To his face. Somewhat sober. What more could I do?
We looked at pictures of a Texas banjo contest from 2006 for a half hour and then were surprised by who won. That stoned.
Chang gave me a 1.5 gallon beer tasting cup, i have a new boyfriend with a huge stick, Members of the Irish Rugby team slapped my ass and cheered for firmness, and a couple of strangers are naming the child after me. Best. Weekend.Ever.
NO MAKING MOLDS OF ANYONES GENITALS
Fine. Suck all the fun out of life.
We shall need something stronger. Anal lube, the blood of a giraffe, and a bay leaf should do the trick. Make the paste and cover your left knee and anus in it.
I described my life as a 7 layer cake of death
Randomize
