There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
I think forcing your little sister to drink with you on a Wednesday when she has school the next day is the low point of alcoholism.
This is one of the fundamental differences between you and I. If I found meat in a plastic bag, I wouldn't put it in my mouth.
Just had such a rough shit, don't stop believin had to be played
i got up, ate a McDouble, then went straight back to bed.
You sure know how to make a day worth living.
If you are breathing, I want you at your house. No non-breathing-related excuses.
Right now, I'm sitting in my room, drinking beer, eating double stuff Oreos, taking bites straight from a block of cheese, and watching Anchor Man 2 trailers. Finals week at its finest
When you're really drunk, Japanese toilets just have an unnecessary amount of buttons.
I slapped him but he didn't wake up. He just nuzzled my head, hugged me closer, and smiled.
I'm drunk from drinking bourbon out of a "cupcake sippy cup" at the Denny's bar. What the fuck happened to the goals I had?
jusy threw up in the airport bathroom. I am no longer thankful for fireball.
i am currently wearing a bowl of frosting on my head. i do not regret any of my life choices leading to this moment
We just had a contest for who has less of a gag reflex...I am sad to admit that my mother won.
Just realized I've spent more nights sleeping on bathroom floors the last two weeks than in my own bed. It's time to reevaluate my life.
Randomize
