also, you're talking to the girl for whom "deformed baby arm" wasn't quite a dealbreaker.
it was like fucking the hulk in a smartcar
At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!
I buy you gas. You blow me. Economics.
Hahaha you puked all over his shirt.
You puked in the planter and everyone saw your snatch.
Well someones bitter they didn't get any.
If I'm gonna go to jail I'm gonna be wearing a poncho
Yelling drunk tank or bust at a cop, not a good idea
Im not spending 10 to get hit on by potential transexuals even if they are cuter than most of the girls I dated.
I told him I'd clean his cock if he ever sent my GF another text message. It was a horrific time for me to miss the l key on my iPhone.
This chick at the gym, just informed me I was super funny this weekend. Especially when I untied her friends bikini top after throwing up in the women's restroom. SWEET black out chronicles has another story
We have a nice shopping list..vibrators and roller blades
Priorities
its like my brain is a tree and you are those little cookie elves
I could drive to your house and kick you in the nuts right now....and not even stop for a burrito
Well you got kicked off a stripper pole. They said girls only.
I slept like a rock because of your dick. I'll thank him personally later.
Randomize