There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
What would Jesus do? ... Jesus would slap a ho.
They should make Jack Daniels chap stick
You should probably wake up already as I have yet another story for you. Teaser? Blood from knife wound. Tequila. Guitar hero. Kitchen counter. Lawyer.
I'm sorry I tried putting my balls in your cup holder.
I puked right in front of him after winning beer olympics and he still hooked up with me. My life is so easy.
Hey, I'm making progress. I haven't thrown up in a bar while wearing a sweater vest in almost two months.
So do you want to be the old guy picking up a girl in a mini skirt who may be slightly buzzed before noon from college, or shall i walk over?
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
I don't WANT a sex disease! Especially one assigned to me by my supervisor..
I'm a full-grown woman and thusly I expect my sphincters to behave themselves.
My fart just smelled like the inside of white castle, I mean spot on, no difference whatsoever.
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
tell me about the eggs
you need to drop off my dinner before you go see him because i'm not gonna wait until you're finished fucking him to get my damn chinese food
Randomize
