honestly, who buys weed with an unemployment check?
you.
oh yeah. preciate
ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
Do you think he likes his girlfriend's moustache?
He made me pinky-promise that he gave me an orgasm.
We made a percocet pizza. And then i made an unfortunate decision.
he was pretty good aside from the whole putting his tongue on my butt thing
she just built a cabin out of hotdogs and cooked it in the microwave.
now she is shaking the plate and mumbling "this is what california must feel like"
He called his prostate his "boner button".
If I don't end up being a booty call for Valentine's Day, you wanna go to the movies?
Ya know what's been the best part of this College Football Season? Not having to hear Brent Musberger say the Honey Badger 77 fucking times.
I should've realized you were drunk when you began to point at my crotch while yelling "Funland!!!"
That was the first time I ever heard of a female getting road head while driving... thanks for the memory and making me happy ending..
ps. i have two very important words to sum up my night
which are?
library sex.
Dude I just woke up naked on the floor with my dick in a boot. Legit in a fucking boot. I also have no idea where I am.
I was so high last night that at one point I kept licking his neck saying he tasted like soap and truffles.
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