we were exchanging secrets last night... she told me about how she put markers in her vaj in middle school. found a keeper.
her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
i just found five singles in my underwear?! im suspicious but delighted none the less
He's the biggest piece of shit to ever exist. He's not even wearing shoes.
just threw up in the bushes outside my lecture hall. sometimes i hate the freedom college gives you.
I'm taking last night back. It officially didn't happen. Tell your friends.
You guys seriously fuck to bieber? That's embarrassing...
The liquor store wont accept checks from us anymore.
Umm, ya, half our class is sitting in starbucks passing around flasks. Yes, flasks. Plural. Going to join them, we're all giving oral presentations in 20. Go hard or go home.
You slow clapped the stripper last night.
I threw up in bed last night and tried cleaning it with oldspice and baby powder
He's my ex's boss. I'm not above sleeping with him for that fact alone.
I just stood beside an Amish man and bought Cocoa Krispies and tampons.
just hooked up with a guy ON MY CAMPUS VISIT. god only knows whats gonna happen when im actually a student
On this version of “Dean Can’t Be a Normal Fucking Human,” I told a guy I’d shove a tv up his ass. Recreationally.
Plasma, LED or OLED?
Randomize
