Bar closing I am hiding in the bathroom. do you think anyone will find me?
i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
Have you ever seen a midget fist pump? BEST. THING. EVERRRRR.
I can't wait til my little brother reaches the point where puking doesn't mean we stop drinking
VODKA 4LOKO BEER NOT IN THE CLEAR
I'm cheerleading for traffic. people are staring. Why am i the only high person on the way to class?
I am not going to ask my mother to pause a movie so I can have phone sex.
Just got gas in my car for the first time while high. Went better than expected.
I was so stoned last night I got into an argument with your voicemail message.
I can't tell if I have the Pizza Hut shits or beer shits
I dont have to work tomorrow im yelling gibberish at squirrels
If I die here, tell my vagina and my cats that I'm sorry.
I sprayed his whole room with my perfume and left lots of my hair on the bed. So now if he does bring her home, the bitch will know this territory is marked.
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