I'm gonna have a badass scar
Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
Fuck. sleeping in my sisters room again I heard zombie noises outside my window
I'm going to skip that pointless convo with Mark, stick with the "we're talking" status, and bone barely legal, borderline gay, preppy guys on the DL.
Given everything we have talked about, is it wrong to ask you to be faithful to me, despite still dating him?
It was like the Alcoholic Olympics...double fisting fifths with eight 40s in my backpack...running from the cops in stilettos. I will have bitchin' hamstrings come Monday.
He stole a bottle of grenadine from the bar. And got arrested. His new cell mate is going to love his bright red lips.
Sometimes I'm jealous of turtles because they can just go to their homes whenever they want by putting their heads in their bodies.
How high are you?
I feel like that's something that he should've asked me over dinner..... instead of with his hand down my pants? maybe not
Well anyways I still cant believe I don't remember such a monumental day in history as you showing me your boobs... Jesus
walk of shame. I'm wearing my rain jacket over my dragon costume. My tail keeps dragging in the rain.
I'm sorry I lead life with my vagina.
If body pillows had a built in vibrator attached I would literally never need a boyfriend again
I think sunday funday got a little out of control. There is cheese slices and BBQ sauce all over the roof and 4 empty bottles of vodka in my room.
If you needed to get laid tonight all you had to do was ask
Randomize
