I showed him my bush... on skype.
i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
just friend requested my arresting officer from last night. too soon??
wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
She came in to my room half naked at 3am asking me if I had seen the movie balls deep 7
Did they have a limo or was i just stoned?
we just finished a porn and sex toy shopping spree. this is the fun part of "being serious"
She got turned on by my fanny pack full of condoms. I can't believe you said it was a bad idea to wear it to the party.
I asked her why she named her vibrator Lorenzo and said it was the name she started screaming her first time.
Maybe you need to change your pickup move. The "hey check these out" titty flash gets you the wrong kinda man.
who started the 'put a scrunchy' around his balls' game?
She thinks you guys are the gods of the bathroom. If she runs past you naked, give me a heads up
well ya only live once...
that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do
I screamed "You look like a guy I've fucked!" to your brother at a party... I have some explaining to do.
He smells like sex and magic. I’m already naming our children
Maybe you should talk to him first
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