i cant believe u jumped in someones trunk just to get out of talking to me
I wish you had a penis so you could experience peeing out the window in front of a crowd of people leaving parties.
Remember when I was so high that I thought my appendix burst? All I had to do was fart man, just fart.
No I am not eating basil off your cock
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
You love him. Dinosaurs. Math. Sex.
He told me he loved me and then asked if we could have sex in the snow
Maybe I'm a robot.
You can't be that drunk already
I'm sitting at work trying to dust glitter off my pants. I can't hang out with her anymore.
We can't go back there. Ever. No context required, just know it's true.
I said his dick tasted like a Hawaiian Sweet Roll. And then I yelled MAHALO.
He radiates elegant sexual dominance. I bet even his balls have pinstripes.
This is a long quiet interstate without somebody to sext.
You were lost on foot. Texted us and told us that N*Sync couldn't save you, and then you "met Jesus" in your car.
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
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