Trimmed my pubes and broke your paper shredder. Separate events.
i wonder what megan fox's vagina feels like.
Heaven soaked bacon.
i'm at a baby shower....never been happier to not be having sex currently
They drank shots out of my cleavage. Surprisingly, the one who did the best was a gay guy.
I've said it before and I'll say it again: your tits are a danger to gay men everywhere.
You know, having a conversation evolve from attractive men to roommate orgies would be weird with anyone else, but you get me.
I think I left my chapstick at your house when I tried using your penis as a catapult and flung it on the floor. Be a dear, and try to see if you can find it.
I gave him shit for taking my sloppy seconds and when I woke up my eyebrow was gone
Find a vagina and bring it to me. Like feeding a tiger.
Amazon.com "suggested" I buy both nipple clamps and opera gloves.
I kinda got drunk and threw my debit card into a bonfire so I don't have any money at the moment lol.
A guy in a gorilla mask got blown on the lawn. And then the night got weird.
I've had sex with three people who have this birthday.
I can show you the world. Shining, splimbering vaginaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
I am NOT pregnant
My barren womb can FUCK WHOEVER I want
Don't do tequila. The Devil himself spits into shot glasses and we call it tequila. You will do bad things.
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