ice luge is my downfall...
...u mean upfall.
Can you come over to my place and make up for the crap you called sex yesterday?
Good morning to you
It's almost like sex with her has gotten boring... like it's still good, but the creativity is lacking... it's times like these that i wish she still wanted me to gag her
You didn't have enough money so you tried to convince the cashier that "four dollar foot long" rolled off the tongue better. Stop drinking. Immediately.
This escort grabbed my boyfriends ass and it became clear, he fucked pretty much anything he could find prior to dating me.
I hope you dream of an avalanche of penises
I just sneezed and it made my entire body ache. Hungover is an understatement
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
Don't worry, the house smells like waffles more than sex
see that vagina ? that vagina means business
well I tackled her when she was going to go upstairs because I was convinced that the house was haunted. You gotta stick together in horror movies.
I mean I only got hit in the ass with ONE firework
Hi I'm on my way to give you multiple screaming orgasms and Easter candy
My mum just told me to stop being so pathetic and just find someone to have sex with, even if I don't like them, just be grateful for the sex. Wow.
There are 6 of us in a mini cooper and his maid is in the trunk...she needed a ride.
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