We played Russian Roulette with a revolving Nerf gun. If you shot yourself in the face, you had to drink.
please dont tell anyone i was drunk
you were publicly making out with a very old very spandex covered woman...they know
Hopefully. Play it cool. Bust out a few jokes. Chew with your mouth closed and show your boobs.
I don't remember her missing an ear while we were at the bar
Recording ancient aliens and the third Reich. Stoned you will thank me later.
He passed out on the floor and you kept hitting him in the dick and screaming "hammer of justice".
Dude, I fucked her last night with nothing but my bandana on. Like straight Indian chief style.
He tried to take a picture of me naked but only got my ass. I don't know his name but if my butt is a guys wallpaper, that's the one I boned.
It is completely possible to eat beef jerky sexually.
I'm dressed in all sequins still at 9:30 in the morning and the worst part is that I actually still fit in in Vegas
I should probably stop opening conversations with 'guess who's horny'.
how does spending your day off taking me to the hospital sound?
Me my naked body. You bring the paints. I expect to be a panther by game time Sunday.
What do I get.
Panthers win you get to fuck the paint off me.
I just sucked dick on a ferry
I was told today that I'm the ugliest bartender in the area, so, I guess I have that going for me.
Randomize
