Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
You ordered a "mcblizzard" and yelled @ the worker for false advertisement because she didn't flip your "mcblizzard" upsidedown. You wanted it free. I'd say mcdonalds daytime workers need to be trained in dealing with daytime drunks too. She didn't know what to do.
it was like that last scene in "It's A Wonderful Life" but with alcohol
I am literally missing a chunk of eyelashes. That's how fun it was.
Sounds good! I plan on writing a book entitled: I've Probably Done Cocaine In Your Bathroom. A tell-all by Lauren.
while she was riding me, she looked at me and said "this is why mom told me learning how to ride a horse would be important for my future"
She sent me nudes via email. What the fuck are we still in the 90s? Grow up
No. Way more drunk than the night I put a snowball in my purse "for later" and woke up to find everything soaking the next day.
But less drunk than the day that Pete took four of your birth control pills thinking they were Advil, right?
How bad was it?
Stopped drinking Sunday, hungover on Tuesday bad.
I hooked up with a guy named Quan.. I literally hit the Quan
He was like 120 lbs and 20 of that was penis
Ya know what's the worst? Being drunk and wanting to show someone a picture of your goddaughter but not wanting to open the pictures on your phone because the first one is of someone's dick..
Yeah I either headbutted a street sign while texting or I defended you two from an evil gang of nazi muggers. I was black out so I am gonna assume it was option b.
Randomize
