I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
i got a blow job in the bathroom during intermission at the hockey game. i'm pretty sure i made Canada proud.
I have a spoon shaped bruise on my ass...
I pretty much threw up on him while he slept, I had one task today which was to wash the sheets that I threw up on and I turned them pink. I would leave me if I could
Its 10:23 on a monday morning and im craving jello shots, this is a problem
Stop inviting me to your birth control calender reminders...my job is to test its effectiveness, not know its schedule
Lmao sorry
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
We swapped clothes. He left in a v-neck and I left in a tuxedo. Classiest walk of shame or the gayest?
shes making a cheerios necklace using dental floss 'just in case' she gets the munchies later
If his smile makes you freak out and drop things imagine what his penis could do
Drunkness level: fluent in olde norse
just because you have a nice tits it doesn't make you a magic little snowflake.
They had like literally all the dildos. It looked like a seance for dick. I left the apartment and haven't been back.
Even if they did assume we were doing kinky shit, it's not like they're gonna be like, "HALT SATAN! INTAKE SOME JESUS AND VOMIT YOUR SINS!"
just caught myself putting beer in the oven and pizza in the fridge. i should be a trainwreck by tonight.
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